Peyronie treatment when husband does not help

A few weeks ago I received an email from a woman who wrote about the trouble she was having with her husband who did not want to cooperate with his Peyronie's treatment:

“My husband of 22 years developed a severely curved penis when his Peyronie problem started after taking blood pressure medicine.  The doctor who prescribed the drug that started this whole mess didn’t seem too upset.  He said we would just have to learn to live with it.

“My husband is a proud man, and he is taking this condition very badly.  He has withdrawn from me and refuses to discuss his condition.   He gets angry and shouts if I bring it up.  We have not had sex in over a year.  He keeps telling me it would be alright with him if I left him.

“What can I do to help him deal with this?”

I wrote back to her:

“Sorry to learn that your husband has withdrawn from his problem and from you.  It is important for you as a wife to remember that your husband’s reaction is very common.  Some men become emotionally devastated by the loss of their sexual ability and sexual identity that they just withdraw from the person they think they are hurting.  There are usually elements of shame and embarrassment that arise from the physical appearance of a severe penile curvature.  It can be very stressful and confusing for a woman in this situation who desperately wants to help.  It can hurt a lot.

“This subject is broad and deep.  In fact, because it is so common and important in Peyronie treatment I devoted a considerable portion of the 2^nd book I wrote to this area of the relationship of any couple dealing with Peyronie's disease.  I suggest you go to the PDI website and order the book, “Peyronie’s Disease and Sex” to learn what you can do to help your husband, because there is actually a lot you can do.  To view information about this book, click “Peyronie’s Disease and Sex”    What you will find is that his inability to face his PD problem, his lack of communication with you, and his withdrawal from sexual contact are all related to fear and shame.  I believe this book will help you to understand what is going on inside him, and what you can do now to bridge the gap between you.

“Please let me know if you have any specific questions I can assist you with.”

Well, I never did hear back from that woman.  The story is very common in which a grown man behaves like a scared little boy when his physical appearance and masculinity are threatened.  It is unfortunate that some marriages get stronger under this stress, while others fall apart under this dark cloud.   There is help and a solid plan of action that many men find comforting and effective to treat their Peyronie problem.

The key seems to be for a woman to convince her spouse to get started with Peyronie’s treatment.  Once a man finds direction and takes control of his situation his attitude and behavior often change for the better.  Don’t allow your man to feel like a Peyronie victim.