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My husband will not see a doctor about his curved penis (we think it is Peyronie’s disease), what should I do?

Posted on by Dr.Herazy

Avoiding medical care for Peyronie’s disease is common  

Refusal to see a doctor about a bent penis is an unwise but common reaction among men who find themselves dealing with the long-term negative prospects of Peyronie’s disease. The male tendency to be slow about seeking medical attention in general is compounded by the shock and utter disbelief of learning that there is actually a urological medical condition called Peyronie’s disease that undermines the ability to function as a sexual human being.

In Peyronie’s disease the development of fibrous plaque tissue below the surface of the shaft results in a curved penis or some other deformity that reduces or eliminates the ability to engage in sexual intercourse.  Making matters worse it frequently reduces the length and girth of the shaft, as well as weakens the quality of erection.

Take advantage of the fact the body cures Peyronies disease half the time

When a woman looks for helpful information about Peyronie’s disease she can turn to the Peyronie’s Disease Institute woman-to-woman program for a telephone discussion during which our nurse will answer any questions about PD treatment, sexual dysfunction problems or anything that is of interest to a woman when her husband will not help himself.

The proposal that a man can move his status from someone who was not able to eliminate his own Peyronie’s disease to become a member of the 50% group who rid themselves of this affliction is a simple and easy one to understand.  It is based on the observation that about half of the men naturally and spontaneously heal or correct their Peyronie’s disease within the first 12-18 months after onset.

When a man finds that he has not self-corrected or eliminated his Peyronies plaque he still has the option to promote his own recovery.  This can be attempted by an aggressive plan to actively support or increase his natural healing ability using several different natural therapies identified by medical research to assist the removal of the offending fibrous plaque material. To find out more about this process go to “Start Peyronie’s treatment.”

Alternative Medicine offers natural treatment options to Peyronie’s surgery and drugs

Since 2002 the Peyronie’s Disease Institute has developed the concepts, as well as nutritional and external techniques, that proposes any man can follow a program of self-administered Alternative Medicine care in an effort to increase his ability to heal and repair the Peyronie’s plaque.  By focusing multiple therapies to enhance healing potential many men find they can increase their immune response against the soft tissue changes that cause all the outward signs and symptoms that are so deeply disturbing and disruptive to normal male function.

This is good news for any man who realizes that there is indeed a cure for Peyronies disease; half of the time the body will naturally rid – or cure – itself of the internal scar or plaque material that causes all the problems of altered sexual structure and reduced sexual ability without any outside help or intervention. In other words many men just get rid of their own PD without any help.  Using well placed and logical assistance that is guided by research done in this area for the last 40 years, the Peyronie’s Disease Institute finds that it is often worthwhile for a man to simply support his immune system to reduce the foreign fibrous material of Peyronie’s disease in order to support his tendency to eliminate his PD fibrous plaque as happens half of the time.

A woman can help her man in many ways   

Probably as the two of you were going through information on the Internet your husband got stuck on the idea that there is nothing that can be done for PD except Peyronie’s surgery, which the Internet information also reports will be followed by recurrence of the same problem in a few years and the possibility of side effects that are sometimes worse than before the surgery (loss of all sensation, constant pain, impotence).  With the negative atmosphere and bleak prospects for medical care associated with Peyronie’s disease many men feel a natural hesitancy to get started moving in that direction.

A great paradox commonly develops for a couple when they struggle to understand what is happening to them when they are first learn about Peyronie’s disease.  The contradiction is that after getting the diagnosis and learning about the disease that neither of them knew existed, the man is typically motivated by embarrassment and fear of the future to be quiet and introspective while the woman instinctively wants to discuss the problem and explore her feelings with others.   As time goes on and Peyronies exerts its negative influence on their lives, each will be driven deeper into their opposite direction, and each will not understand why their partner is behaving that way.  This makes for increasing tension between the couple while they should be coming closer together to deal with their mutual problem.

The special relationship between a woman and a man is always tested greatly when Peyronies enters the scene.  While not absolutely true, it has been my observation that most couples will find that the many trials and tribulations of Peyronie’s disease and women will cause whatever is good and strong in their relationship to increase and become better, and whatever is troubled and weak in their relationship to deteriorate further.  Peyronie’s disease does not actually create new conflict within a relationship, but only increases and intensifies whatever strength or weakness was present before it arrived on the scene; it acts as a great reference point that amplifies whatever was going on between the couple before its arrival.  It does not have to be that way, but it happens because people are not prepared for what lies ahead.  They are caught so unprepared for the drama that becomes their lives together that the truth of their relationship is not only exposed but it is exaggerated by the emotions that emerge.

During countless talks with PD couples since 2002 it has been observed many times that either a couple is a naturally good problem-solving team, or it is not.   When it is not, and the man and woman do not work together well, it is very difficult for them to develop and practice whatever new personal skills of good communication, tolerance, compassion, forgiveness or whatever assistance might be needed to help their situation.  It takes extra effort and great patience to acquire the skills and ability needed to come together as a team, while at the same time dealing with the harsh realities of Peyronie’s disease.  Just as it might be difficult to learn to swim while being swept away in a flood, it is just as difficult to develop those skills that lead to becoming a solid team if at the same time they are being tossed about while dealing with PD.  Having presented that observation, it should bring comfort to know it is still possible to minimize and perhaps even overcome the negative and destructive forces that develop as a result of Peyronies disease if exceptional effort and honesty are applied.

You can begin to help your husband with his Peyronie’s disease by encouraging him with information that it might be possible to help himself correct his own PD problem as those 50% of men whose internal plaque are naturally eliminated.  Offer this information to him, showing him that there are more options available to him than Peyronie’s surgery.

Sex hurts because my husband’s penis is crooked, can we get help?

Posted on by Dr.Herazy

Painful sexual intercourse of Peyronie’s disease can often be eliminated or reduced

Painful sexual intercourse when due to medical or psychological causes is medically known as dyspareunia (dis-pair-oo-nee-uh).  While this kind of pain is most often reported exclusively by women, it is also reported amongst men who have a curved penis due to Peyronie’s disease.

Assuming that your husband has a curved penis because of Peyronie’s disease, there are several different ways and areas of their life that a couple can work together to improve, and possibly eliminate, the pain they experience during sexual intercourse. While most people assume that the pain is the direct result of a curved penis, it has been shown it is necessary to consider the effects of the multiple factors that are unique to Peyronie’s disease and capable of affecting sexual function.  To help a situation in which intercourse is painful because of the effects of Peyronie’s disease it is usually necessary to use more than one treatment approach.

Do not make a hasty assumption that the cause of your pain during intercourse is a crooked penis; you might be right, but then again you might be only partially correct.

The topic of pain during intercourse is so common and so important to couples who deal with Peyronie’s disease that the Peyronie’s Disease Institute offers two valuable methods to learn how often eradicate the problem, or at least minimize it greatly.  The first is a special program in which our staff nurse will personally consult with and advise any woman who needs help in a program called “Woman to Woman.”  Women can speak to our nurse to ask questions of any sort that deal Peyronie’s disease, from the anatomy and physiology of sexual intercourse to suggestions for intercourse positions and lubrication options, as well as help dealing with sexual difficulties.  The second is a book written by Dr. Theodore Herazy titled, “Peyronie’s Disease and Sex,” that covers many of the diverse problems faced by couples who find intercourse painful or restricted by a curved penis or erectile dysfunction.

There are many different deformity patterns (bend, curve, indentation, rotation or twisting, hourglass and bottleneck, as well as combinations of these) plus different degrees of those penile distortions and curvatures that can contribute to different levels of pain experienced during intercourse. Even so, a bent penis is usually not the sole reason for painful intercourse for a couple dealing with Peyronie’s disease.  Just like the difficulty of putting a square peg in a round hole, a curved penis will certainly get someone’s attention and be the natural assumption for the cause of painful intercourse.

However, the amount of pain and even the absence of pain during intercourse that is due to a curved penis often presents a  surprisingly inconsistent and unexpected pattern; it is difficult to predict the failure or success of intercourse, or even if pain will or will not occur, based solely on the external appearance of the man’s penis.  It is not possible to say that a couple will experience pain or failure to complete entry for sexual intercourse only based on how much or where the penis is bent or distorted.

Women get help with painful sexual intercourse related to Peyronie's disease

The Peyronie’s Disease Institute nurse has advised and counseled many men and women who had not been able to engage in sexual intercourse because of pain for several years, even though the penile distortion involved sometimes is not great, less than 10 degrees.  Conversely, she has encountered a large number of happy couples, who in spite of having to deal with penile curvature approaching 90 degrees, were still able to engage in satisfying sexual intercourse without pain.

Based on these observations, there must be something else going on that explains why one couple will have problems with a small Peyronie’s curve and another couple will not have any apparent problems with a large Peyronie’s curve.

From our experience it is common for other seemingly small and less obvious factors to turn out to be the sole reason for pain during sex, or at least the primary contributor, rather than the more obvious curved penis. Nevertheless, to find a solution for painful intercourse that is part of the Peyronie’s experience it is important to consider all possible factors and not the just obvious.  Unless all the issues that contribute to painful sex are identified and addressed, pain will likely continue to be a problem, often getting worse over time since interpersonal problems tend to escalate.

The most common cause of pain during sexual intercourse is a simple lack of vaginal lubrication that normally is secreted during arousal to make penetration easier and reduce friction and irritation during coitus.  Some common reasons a woman would experience a lack of lubrication are:

Menopause – reduced progesterone and estrogen hormone production after age 50
causes many changes in the ability of the reproductive system to operate in a way that favors reproduction.  Thinning of the vaginal walls, less natural lubricant production and pain during sex are common signs of menopause.

Lack of foreplay – hurried sex does not allow for adequate time for natural secretions to be produced.

Disinterest or emotional issues about sex – a variety of past and current issues can be at play to reduce sexual interest in either partner

Vaginismus – an involuntary spasm or tightness of the muscles surrounding the vagina, especially at the opening, making penetration difficult, painful or impossible. This tightening and subsequent pain while attempting entry can have several possible causes: past sexual trauma or abuse, a history of discomfort with sexual intercourse, and at times no cause can be found. Psychological factors related to Peyronie’s disease are commonly found to be at the heart of vaginismus often develops because of anxiety regarding sexual intercourse, such as remembering the traumatic event that happened during intercourse that caused the Peyronie’s disease injury in the first place, the guilt and anxiety about causing his Peyronie’s disease, the anger about being in a relationship that is marred by a curved penis, the fear another accident might happen making his PD even worse.  Vaginismus treatment involves education and counseling for the couple, behavioral exercises, and vaginal dilation exercises using plastic dilators. This type of therapy should be done under the direction of a sex therapist or other health care provider experienced in this area of sexual dysfunction.

A wide range of emotional issues that are rooted in Peyronie’s disease result in pain during sex because they cause of variable degrees of vaginismus and reduced sexual lubrication:

Anger and frustration about being in a relationship without normal sex

Fear of making his Peyronie’s worse during sex with another accident

Fear that the Peyronie’s disease is contagious – and it is not – and could result in problems for the female partner

Fear that the deformed penis will injure the vagina

Guilt since she was one who caused sex accident

Low expectation to gain entry since penis does not look like it would be able to fit

If you are a woman experiencing pain during intercourse while also dealing with Peyronie’s disease, contact the PDI nurse via to get help identifying and eliminating all issues that might be involved.

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Is there anything I can do to help my husband recover from Peyronie’s disease?

Posted on by Dr.Herazy

Any woman can help and support his effort to reduce Peyronies disease in several ways

There obvious and not so obvious, direct and indirect, ways a woman can help the man in her life to deal with his problems of Peyronie’s disease not only on a personal treatment basis, but also by supporting and assisting with those personal matters that threaten their relationship as a social and sexual couple.

It goes without saying that the obvious physical problems of a curved penis, reduced length and girth, and erectile dysfunction that are part of Peyronie’s disease directly affect the man who has this condition.  But the woman in a relationship with such a man is in a critical position because of their personal relationship to help him deal with the many negative aspects of Peyronie’s disease, and so can provide an integral part of any solution he might need.  Her role begins by understanding and accepting that he is going through a strange and stressful event for which no man is ever prepared.  Throughout a woman’s life, even before her teen years, she is talked to and prepared for changes in her reproductive system; she discusses these events that affect her genital area with her mother and perhaps her sisters and girlfriends who also experience these changes; she even goes to a special kind of doctor, a gynecologist, who specializes just in the female reproductive system; each month she is reminded that her pelvic region does unusual things; if she becomes pregnant she soon overcomes her modesty and privacy about this area of her body.  A man does not ever experience anything remotely like that.  His genitals are his prized masculine region, but they are private.  For the most part his reproductive area is uneventful and is not discussed much – except if he develops Peyronie’s disease.

For these reasons he has been completely unprepared by his past experiences to deal with  suddenly learning that there is a problem he has never heard of before, called Peyronie’s disease, that jeopardizes his ability to engage in sexual intercourse and denies him the act that defines manhood to him.   For a man Peyronie’s disease is perhaps not so much experienced as a health problem in which fibrous plaque material develops internally within the penis, but more so it is felt to be a loss of what makes him a man.  The woman who must deal with her man’s Peyronies problem must see this condition as a great emotional issue for him and be prepared to forgive him if his temperament and mood suffers while he comes to grips with his curved penis that no longer works as it once did.

He will benefit greatly from his mate’s emotional support and patience, and her ability to forgive him while he wrestles with the fears that are connected to Peyronie’s disease. Probably his biggest fear is the losing you because of his reduced sexual ability; no longer being able to provide you the pleasure of sexual intercourse, that you will leave him for someone else. He fears that he will never experience regain the pleasure of traditional sexual satisfaction. He fears that if you do leave him he will never be able to develop a relationship with another woman, and he will be alone in life. He fears being pitied and ridiculed as the man with the deformed and shrunken penis. He fears feeling like less of a man.  It is not really the physical aspects of Peyronie’s disease that drives a man into despair, it is being unprepared for the emotional isolation he feels.  More than ever he needs you but he feels ashamed and embarrassed to be with you, adding to the torment he feels.

From the combination of physical, emotional and sexual problems related to Peyronie’s disease comes a list of common problems and pitfalls that happen to most couples. Since the man with Peyronie’s disease will often shut down emotionally and a state of denial, totally ignoring his problem, the burden to actively learn about and reach out for help will fall to the woman in that relationship. From this reason the Peyronie’s Disease Institute has developed  a special program in which our staff nurse can consult with and advise a woman who needs help dealing with any aspect of Peyronie’s disease.  During a friendly phone call our nurse will answer questions of any sort about Peyronie’s disease (male and female anatomy, sexual difficulties, personal relationship problems, treatment options, or anything else that is on her mind).

Here are a few ideas to consider to help him deal with his penile problems and to protect the bonds of your family:

  1. Continue your usual sex life if at all possible, limiting traditional intercourse only to the extent that his curved penis prevents it.  In case you believe that you cannot any longer engage in intercourse, please know that there are many techniques and ideas that can help you allow entry and increase your ability for traditional sexual intercourse. Few couples are as limited in their ability to engage in intercourse as they assume; usually all they need are some basic ideas and simple instruction. This is such an important topic; please refer to my second book that covers many aspects of this topic at great detail and length, “Peyronie’s Disease and Sex.”
  2. An important aspect of Alternative Medicine treatment of PD is the PDI diet to assist recovery from Peyronies.   This subject is covered in detail in chapter 5 of “Peyronie’s Disease Handbook.”  You can assist his recovery greatly if you can coach him through these dietary ideas, and make it easier to follow if you incorporate these principles into your lifestyle for the time being.
  3. Moral support at this time is crucial.  You will help him, and help yourself as well, if you can offer him encouragement and praise during these rough times.  You will prove your loyalty and earn his admiration and respect when you demonstrate you are not a fair weather friend.  Men commonly refer to their time dealing with Peyronie’s disease as the lowest point of their lives, feeling alone and depressed, offering them all the excuse needed to behave badly.  Just because a man is acting like a jerk does not mean he does not know he is acting like a jerk; he knows his behavior is bad; he just does not care to control his primitive emotions of the moment. This is the time a man needs a friend to offer support and a trusting heart.  Even though he might push you away out of embarrassment and self-consciousness for his reduced physical state, he will soon recognize your acts of steadfast friendship and tolerance as proof you are not going to reject him.  Once he is confident you are not going to run away because of his sexual problems, your man will come around to his old self (and probably better) because you will have proven your love for him to an even greater level than he knew before.  This is how your relationship will grow under the adversity of Peyronie’s disease, by showing your strength and loyalty to him no matter what happens.
  4. Be tolerant and understanding about his reduced sexual interest and flawed sexual ability.  Both of you are afraid of what will happen in the future regarding your sex life together.  The way to make our fears become a reality is to place a lot of pressure on his sexual performance.  Easy does it.  As discussed at length in “Peyronie’s Disease and Sex,” we find that most couples can actually engage in sexual intercourse for a far longer time than they imagine, but stop only because the do not know how to solve get around some of the difficulties of gaining entry with a bent penis; this book explains how to be successful with sex using a curved penis than you could imagine.  In the early stages of Peyronies it is most valuable to continue traditional intercourse for as long as possible.  It is not necessary to stop sexual activity as long as no pain occurs for either partner.  Engaging in sexual activity is good for the physical and emotional health of both partners, as well as beneficial for your personal relationship.  Sex can be the all-important emotional glue that keeps you together, so use sex liberally since PD is really all about sex when you think about it.  If you reduce sexual activity at this time it will only confirm his worse fear that you are no longer interested in him as a sexual person. If traditional sexual intercourse turns out to not be possible due to his curved penis it is necessary to explore, expand and use a greater variety non-intercourse sexual activities and techniques, with the hands, lips and whatever else is mutually agreeable to you as a couple.  Your previous thinking and attitude about sexual activity might have to change to satisfy your unfulfilled physical needs for intimacy.  With an open and honest dialogue you can work these things out.  Again, your helpful and willing approach to sexual problem solving and cooperation only proves your place in his heart as the best possible partner he can have.

Many of the conflicts and stresses a couple goes through when Peyronie’s disease enters their lives are avoidable.  A little understanding, a few suggestions about altered sex techniques, the man having the woman’s side explained to him, the woman having the man’s side explained to her, reading the positive and informative books that are available from the Peyronie’s Disease Institute, and starting an aggressive Alternative Medicine treatment plan to increase his ability to heal and repair the Peyronies plaque can do wonders to reduce stress and misunderstanding between people dealing with Peyronie’s disease.

If the woman would keep in mind that her man with Peyronie’s disease is very much like a scared little boy who is behaving badly because he is scared of losing you, and treat him accordingly, things would improve greatly. With understanding, love and a little compassion you can help that little boy know you are not going to leave him and you will protect your relationship with him.