Tag Archives: intercourse

Sex hurts because my husband’s penis is crooked, can we get help?

Posted on by Dr.Herazy

Painful sexual intercourse of Peyronie’s disease can often be eliminated or reduced

Painful sexual intercourse when due to medical or psychological causes is medically known as dyspareunia (dis-pair-oo-nee-uh).  While this kind of pain is most often reported exclusively by women, it is also reported amongst men who have a curved penis due to Peyronie’s disease.

Assuming that your husband has a curved penis because of Peyronie’s disease, there are several different ways and areas of their life that a couple can work together to improve, and possibly eliminate, the pain they experience during sexual intercourse. While most people assume that the pain is the direct result of a curved penis, it has been shown it is necessary to consider the effects of the multiple factors that are unique to Peyronie’s disease and capable of affecting sexual function.  To help a situation in which intercourse is painful because of the effects of Peyronie’s disease it is usually necessary to use more than one treatment approach.

Do not make a hasty assumption that the cause of your pain during intercourse is a crooked penis; you might be right, but then again you might be only partially correct.

The topic of pain during intercourse is so common and so important to couples who deal with Peyronie’s disease that the Peyronie’s Disease Institute offers two valuable methods to learn how often eradicate the problem, or at least minimize it greatly.  The first is a special program in which our staff nurse will personally consult with and advise any woman who needs help in a program called “Woman to Woman.”  Women can speak to our nurse to ask questions of any sort that deal Peyronie’s disease, from the anatomy and physiology of sexual intercourse to suggestions for intercourse positions and lubrication options, as well as help dealing with sexual difficulties.  The second is a book written by Dr. Theodore Herazy titled, “Peyronie’s Disease and Sex,” that covers many of the diverse problems faced by couples who find intercourse painful or restricted by a curved penis or erectile dysfunction.

There are many different deformity patterns (bend, curve, indentation, rotation or twisting, hourglass and bottleneck, as well as combinations of these) plus different degrees of those penile distortions and curvatures that can contribute to different levels of pain experienced during intercourse. Even so, a bent penis is usually not the sole reason for painful intercourse for a couple dealing with Peyronie’s disease.  Just like the difficulty of putting a square peg in a round hole, a curved penis will certainly get someone’s attention and be the natural assumption for the cause of painful intercourse.

However, the amount of pain and even the absence of pain during intercourse that is due to a curved penis often presents a  surprisingly inconsistent and unexpected pattern; it is difficult to predict the failure or success of intercourse, or even if pain will or will not occur, based solely on the external appearance of the man’s penis.  It is not possible to say that a couple will experience pain or failure to complete entry for sexual intercourse only based on how much or where the penis is bent or distorted.

Women get help with painful sexual intercourse related to Peyronie's disease

The Peyronie’s Disease Institute nurse has advised and counseled many men and women who had not been able to engage in sexual intercourse because of pain for several years, even though the penile distortion involved sometimes is not great, less than 10 degrees.  Conversely, she has encountered a large number of happy couples, who in spite of having to deal with penile curvature approaching 90 degrees, were still able to engage in satisfying sexual intercourse without pain.

Based on these observations, there must be something else going on that explains why one couple will have problems with a small Peyronie’s curve and another couple will not have any apparent problems with a large Peyronie’s curve.

From our experience it is common for other seemingly small and less obvious factors to turn out to be the sole reason for pain during sex, or at least the primary contributor, rather than the more obvious curved penis. Nevertheless, to find a solution for painful intercourse that is part of the Peyronie’s experience it is important to consider all possible factors and not the just obvious.  Unless all the issues that contribute to painful sex are identified and addressed, pain will likely continue to be a problem, often getting worse over time since interpersonal problems tend to escalate.

The most common cause of pain during sexual intercourse is a simple lack of vaginal lubrication that normally is secreted during arousal to make penetration easier and reduce friction and irritation during coitus.  Some common reasons a woman would experience a lack of lubrication are:

Menopause – reduced progesterone and estrogen hormone production after age 50
causes many changes in the ability of the reproductive system to operate in a way that favors reproduction.  Thinning of the vaginal walls, less natural lubricant production and pain during sex are common signs of menopause.

Lack of foreplay – hurried sex does not allow for adequate time for natural secretions to be produced.

Disinterest or emotional issues about sex – a variety of past and current issues can be at play to reduce sexual interest in either partner

Vaginismus – an involuntary spasm or tightness of the muscles surrounding the vagina, especially at the opening, making penetration difficult, painful or impossible. This tightening and subsequent pain while attempting entry can have several possible causes: past sexual trauma or abuse, a history of discomfort with sexual intercourse, and at times no cause can be found. Psychological factors related to Peyronie’s disease are commonly found to be at the heart of vaginismus often develops because of anxiety regarding sexual intercourse, such as remembering the traumatic event that happened during intercourse that caused the Peyronie’s disease injury in the first place, the guilt and anxiety about causing his Peyronie’s disease, the anger about being in a relationship that is marred by a curved penis, the fear another accident might happen making his PD even worse.  Vaginismus treatment involves education and counseling for the couple, behavioral exercises, and vaginal dilation exercises using plastic dilators. This type of therapy should be done under the direction of a sex therapist or other health care provider experienced in this area of sexual dysfunction.

A wide range of emotional issues that are rooted in Peyronie’s disease result in pain during sex because they cause of variable degrees of vaginismus and reduced sexual lubrication:

Anger and frustration about being in a relationship without normal sex

Fear of making his Peyronie’s worse during sex with another accident

Fear that the Peyronie’s disease is contagious – and it is not – and could result in problems for the female partner

Fear that the deformed penis will injure the vagina

Guilt since she was one who caused sex accident

Low expectation to gain entry since penis does not look like it would be able to fit

If you are a woman experiencing pain during intercourse while also dealing with Peyronie’s disease, contact the PDI nurse via to get help identifying and eliminating all issues that might be involved.

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Peyronie’s Disease and Intercourse

Posted on by Dr.Herazy

Peyronies and problems with sexual intercourse

Sexual intercourse can be a problem in Peyronie’s disease due to the penile distortion that occurs because of the presence of fibrous scar tissue, or Peyronie’s plaque, within the shaft of the penis.  The presence of this fibrous plaque can cause the penis is bend in any direction to a minor degree that is hardly noticeable, up to and even beyond a 90 degree curve.  In addition to a significant bend, Peyronies disease can also cause distortions that are described as “bottle neck” and “hour glass” for their resemblance, as well as simple dents or dings along the side of the shaft. Click here for Peyronie’s pictures.

The cause of Peyronie’s disease has not yet been determined even thought the condition has been known for almost 500 years.  Some researchers theorize the distortion forms as a result of trauma to the penis, or when minor contact causes an indirect micro-trauma shearing force that can result in minor bleeding into the wide area of tissue.   While healing is taking place certain growth factors that appear to be genetically determined cause an abnormal amount of scar tissue (or plaque) to form at the site of injury.

The penis is composed of three cylindrical cavities, with two of these at the top and one below.  The top two are wider and thicker, and are called the corpus cavernosa, while bottom cylinder is the corpus spongiosum and contains the urethra or the tube through which urine flows.  During erection the two top corpora cavernosa expand to trap and hold the blood that produces the pneumatic force that results in enlargement and rigidity.   Each of these paired cylinders is surrounded by a very elastic covering called the tunica albuginea, similar to the casing of a sausage.

In a case of Peyronie’s disease the elastic tissue of the tunica is replaced by scar tissue, so it lacks flexibility and the ability to stretch.  Because the plaque is not elastic, but rather hard, it will not stretch with erection.  When this happens the erection that occurs is not even or symmetrical, and often smaller than before.

What starts out as a small nodule or constriction on the penile shaft just below the skin surface, eventually expands to form a flat plaque or deposit that can sometimes extend along the entire length of the shaft.  This plaque invades and replaces the elastic tunica albuginea covering of the internal tissue of the penis, leaving a mass of inflexible material. In some patients the penis beyond the plaque will not become as rigid. When a man with this degree of extensive Peyronie’s has an erection, the scar or plaque material cannot expand, resulting in a curved or bent penis, or one that exhibits a bottle neck or hour glass deformity – or a combination of these distortion patterns.

Often the plaque is located on the top surface of the penis, causing an upward curvature.  However, plaques can occur anywhere on the penis; the scar or plaque will always be worse on the concave portion of the distortion pattern.

Many men with Peyronie’s disease complain not only about their curved or distorted erection, but also about the loss of length and girth. These are all results of the inelastic tissue within the substance of the penile body.

Peyronies curved penis and sexual intercourse

One-third of men with Peyronie’s have pain when erect, and a smaller number become impotent. In some cases, the head of the penis does not fill with blood, resulting in a penis that is erect on the bottom near the pubic area, and soft or flaccid toward the top part of the penis – this is called a bottle neck deformity.  This type of distortion would make intercourse difficult due to penetration problems.  About half of men with Peyronie’s disease continue to function sexually when their curving penis is gradual and minor.  But as the curvature becomes abrupt and large the amount of sexual difficulty also increases.   Half of men with Peyronies experience frequent to constant problems with intercourse due to their distortion pattern.

For in-depth solutions and discussion of the sexual problems related to Peyronie’s disease please review the contents of Peyronie’s Disease & Sex, a one-of-a-kind book written by a man who completely cured his PD using the Alternative Medicine treatment principles found on the Peyronie’s Disease Institute website.

Peyronie’s Disease and How to Avoid Infidelity

Posted on by Dr.Herazy

Marital stress caused by Peyronie's disease

If having Peyronie’s disease was not stressful enough on a relationship, it has been reported by The New York Times that more men and women than ever are cheating on each other.

This blog article does not intend to plant the seeds of anxiety, doubt, or suspicion about an unfaithful mate, because these thoughts have likely occurred within the first hour for any every man who learns his curved penis is caused by Peyronies disease.  This blog post is offered to address that common fear and anxiety, and offer advice for what you can do to increase your ability to keep your relationship solid and strong.  So read on, since this is additional reason for men with a bent penis to be interested in improving their romantic talents and sexual skills.    In a recent newspaper article, The New York Times commented that University of Washington researchers discovered more men and women are cheating today than in the past.  What is termed the lifetime rate of infidelity is greater for both sexes; for men over 60 infidelity is now at 28 percent, up from 21 percent. The frequency of infidelity has tripled for women, with infidelity now at 15 percent.

Apparently it is the temptation offered by the modern age, in the form of cell phones, e-mail communication and instant text messaging that allow people, including women who work at home, to create intimate relationships with those who are not their traditional partners.   Pepper Schwartz, Ph.D., author of Prime: Adventures and Advice on Sex, Love and the Sensual Years, believes women are more inclined to wander and experiment with others is because of growing independence and ease of maintaining private communication with different people.  Dr. Schwartz notes that if a person was sexually active while single or unattached, that person is more likely to be dissatisfied and roam if their current relationship develops problems.

“If things aren’t great, they are more open to reliving some of the sexual passion and high points of their single days,” Schwartz says.

At what point in a relationship do things become not great?  “[People] get bored or feel like, ‘Is this all there is?’ ” Schwartz says. “[The reasons] for men and women are the same: They need reassurance and they’re feeling unappreciated.”   So, notice here that Dr. Schwartz is not replying that a woman becomes unfaithful because she is not receiving adequate sexual activity, or that she is unhappy with the number of orgasms or the size of his penis.  This is an extremely important point.  It has been my observation that men with Peyronie’s disease develop relationship problems more because of how they behave on the emotional relationship or social level, than on the sexual physical level.

Dissatisfaction in a romantic relationship usually revolves around something any man with Peyronie’s disease can always provide, in spite of a bent penis – he can always offer her respect, reassurance and appreciation.  Keep in mind that the real dissatisfaction in a romantic relationship is often more about emotional issues than physical issues.  Even when the woman expresses sexual dissatisfaction with her mate, they come to the surface only because of deeper and larger problems that are emotional in nature.  Men tend to think of a relationship more so from the purely physical aspect, while women tend to think of a relationship more so from the purely emotional aspect.  This is the wonderful, and problematic, difference between the sexes.

A man with the bent penis of Peyronie’s disease thinks he has a problem in his relationship because of the physical problems with sex.  This is often not true.  A man would think this way, while a woman doe not.  For a woman the real issues of highest importance are the critical personal human issues of respect, reassurance, appreciation, and an emotional bond that is strong and frequently satisfied.  I have seen that if a woman is emotionally satisfied, she is far, far more likely to willingly accept her mates reduced physical limitations.

I spend a great amount of time discussing all phases and aspects of this exact issue that arises in Peyronie’s disease between a man and a woman in my book, “Peyronie’s Disease & Sex.”  This book has saved many marriages and relationships over the years.  I urge you to read it if you are having relationship problems because of your Peyronies.

Peyronie’s disease and romance

On a daily basis, with so many interferences and stresses that separate a couple, romance is difficult to maintain.  However, there many easy and fun things any man with Peyronie’s disease can do, no matter how badly his penis curvature interferes with usual sexual activity.   These are five positive and pleasant steps you can take, even if you cannot engage in intercourse, that will assist you greatly to keep her interested and close to you:

1. Spend more time together. A good relationship requires time together and alone with that special person.  Give her the attention she craves.  Go out with her to do things that you previously avoided.  Go grocery shopping together.  Tag along when she does a few errands, or to her work functions you usually avoid. Help her with some chores that you can share together.  Be a friend to her in ways that you did not see before.  Dr. Schwartz advises, “You can’t do it all, but even if you’re there sometimes, it will remind her that she’s part of a great couple instead of an individual out there on her own.

2. Keep your relationship fresh and fun. See where you have fallen into a level of dullness in your lives, and make some changes.  While you might simply see a schedule, she might see a rut.  Eating at the same restaurant, doing the same things each evening after work, being far too predictable, or not adding variety to your lives together can take the edge off a relationship.  Even sex can become part of that predictable quality that becomes less fun and boring.  Suggest a “nooner,” then meet her back at the apartment for lunch in bed. “Rent an erotic movie, go shopping for a sex toy, buy her a sexy teddy,” Schwartz suggests. “Make her believe no one could be as romantic or as much fun as you are.”  With Peyronie’s disease putting limits on your sexual activity, it is important that you compensate by improving those elements of your personal and romantic relationship that can be improved, no matter how far your penis is curved.

3. Deal with all that sudden anger. Men with Peyronie’s disease are notorious for their anger.  I will write a blog post about this problem soon, but for now let’s just agree that your temper lately has gotten out of control far too often and far too extreme.  Do not use anger as a way to avoid the problems of Peyronie’s disease.  Take the issues and problems you now face, and discuss them directly with her because she needs to know what is going on with you – your fears, your embarrassment, your feelings about your masculinity, your insecurity about your relationship with her, all of it.  Many men cannot talk about these things, so they explode.  ”Anger is like a termite—you don’t see it, but it’s eating the walls and the structure of the house you’re living in,” Dr. Schwartz says. “The house is the relationship, and if you don’t handle it, the termites will ultimately destroy that bond which keeps someone loyal.”   You did not ask to have Peyronie’s disease, but it is your decision and your ultimate fault if you allow your anger to erode your relationship.

4. Learn how to use time. Dr. Schwartz advises that time can be used to diffuse and calm a tense situation.  “What you don’t want to do is have a fight when you’re mad. Say, ‘Look, you’re upset, I’m upset, let’s meet tomorrow at breakfast and talk about this. I’m not in the best shape to deal with it right now.’ ” Talk about your problems, sure, but only do so when you are levelheaded and in control of yourself.  If you are not, the chance is good that you will only make things worse.  Use time to work in your favor to solve your relationship problems.

5.  Create, or take advantage of, romantic moments. Even though it can be extremely corny and uncomfortable for a man, let’s just assume that all women really enjoy those Hallmark moments:  sitting by the fireplace, reading a book together, washing her hair or doing her nails, sending her an email that tells her in simple language how much you love her, or just holding hands while you walk.  Women think of these small things as great foreplay, and that is why they appreciate it when a man holds open a door, or takes care of her in small but important ways.  Dr. Schwartz says, “The less [of these moments] you have, the more she’s thinking how it used to be, or how nice it would be to have a man offering to fly her to a cabin in the woods.”  Make sure you are the one she is fantasizing about, by creating foreplay with simple acts of consideration, reassurance that you value her, and appreciation for who she is and what she does.   “You don’t have to do it all the time, but if you can’t remember the last time you did any of this, it’s way too long,” Schwartz says.

Even if you do not have Peyronie’s disease, these things will improve and deepen your relationship.  But if you have Peyronie’s disease these things become all the more important.  You must do all that you can to support and strengthen your relationship with her, now that one element of your physical ability to satisfy her is diminished.

Peyronie’s disease does not destroy a relationship; it is allowed to die when the man who has PD does not understand what motivates his woman.  Wise up.